- North Carolina Department of Correction
- Worcester County, Maryland
- Airway Heights, WA – Correctional Center
- Hampton, VA. – Parents Educating Parents
- Cincinnati, OH. – attended Suma’s graduation ceremony
- Oneida Tribe of Indians – Follow up AAPI to a former enrolled father
- Men comment on completing the Nurturing Father’s Course
- Baby, Father, and Grandfather reunite through Nurturing Fathers Program
- “This program really changed my life.” Testimonials – Racine Family YMCA 2014
#1 Greetings from the Western Region of
the North Carolina Department of Correction.
I received the information in regards to the training in
Florida. It sounds wonderful….but I will be unable to attended. I thought I would send you a note and share where we are with our program.
As you know you came to Lenoir, North Carolina in January of 2006 for 2 days to conduct training. Since that time we have implemented this program at 12 minimum custody facilities in the Western Region of North Carolina. This program is funded through a grant awarded by the Governor’s Crime Commission. The Father Accountability Program uses the Nurturing Father’s Program as the approved curriculum. We are into the second program cycle since implementation. The response has been great from the inmate participates. Here are some testimonies from the inmate participants:
1- “This program really helped me to have a better understanding and meaning of what a father is suppose to do to manage and be involved in his children’s life.”
2- “I feel that it is a very positive program and very helpful
for those who did not have father’s in their lives to teach us how to become nurturing, loving, accountable father’s to our children.”
3- ” I learned a lot on how to be a better husband as well as a
better and more productive Father.”
4- ” It makes you look at life different. If you are a father,
uncle or brother to any young child. It helps in all your relationships.”
5- ” The class was great and helped me to understand the way a father should be and what a father should do for his child and family.”
6- “The program taught me how to talk to my kids without
hollering all the time. I now know that spending time with my kids develops a better relationship.”
7- ” I believe anyone with children could benefit from this
program. It definitely has merit! I am glad I got to participate.”
8- ” It helped me to realize that even though I’m in prison I
can still make a positive impact on my daughters life. I can’t change or take back the mistakes I’ve made and I can’t get back all the years I spent in here (PRISON) away from her….but I can start right now and continue for the rest of
my life being the best Dad I possibly can. This class gave me a lot of hope and new found faith in myself as a father.
9- “It’s a good program. A lot of guys come from dysfunctional
homes and relationships. They need to be exposed to some normal values and ways to resolve conflict. I like the fact that a lot of guys opened up and shared about their experiences.”
10- ” This program has helped me to see areas where I needed to improve my relationship with my children. I liked the way it emphasizes the importance of showing your children love regardless of the circumstances. It is a great program and has already helped me in my relationship with my children.”
These testimonies are powerful stuff! The North Carolina Department of Corrections’ goals and objectives are to address successful re-entry, recidivism, improve family relationships of the offenders and reduce criminal activity and juvenile delinquency by offenders children.
Statistics speak loud, as research shows that children of offenders are more likely to become involved in the judicial system. We all know that part of our problem in society is poor parental supervision and control. The tools in the Nurturing Father’s curriculum transitions back into society with the offenders.
Anything we can do to educate offenders and aide in their rehabilitation is a step in the right direction. The Nurturing Father’s Program curriculum is the tool of choice for the North Carolina Department of Correction. We currently have 48 staff and Volunteers trained to facilitate this program. Thanks for the insight to develop such a powerful tool that can be used not only by the general public but also by agencies and organizations that deal with special populations of men. As stated in The Nurturing Father’s curriculum “parenting is a learned behavior.” Here’s to knowledge! It is powerful. May we continue to forge into the future knowing we are doing what we can for the children of the world.
Fatherhood…. The toughest job you’ll ever love!!
Audrey Berry, Father Accountability Program Coordinator
North Carolina Department of Correction, Western Region
#2 Nurturing Fathers Update
I just wanted to fill you in on our success in Worcester County, Maryland with Nurturing Fathers. We have found our niche, I have currently started a class of
Nurturing Fathers in our local Detention Center and it has taken off. We will be offering three classes a year in the Detention Center with a maximum of 12 per class, size restraint from our room location. We currently have a waiting list. Of course being located in the jail I had to take out the Play group activity.
The subject matter hits home with each of my fathers and we have the best discussions on stress and Anger management. They really look forward to the class and kids are first in our discussions.
We also have classes for the general public, one story I would like to tell you about was a father who was in Addictions counseling, Mental Health counseling,
and being serviced by social services. He had three daughters ages ranging from 9 to 12. The social service case worker had referred clients to me before, and
she thought this class won’t hurt.
They were having trouble with him opening up and having a lot of anger. Once in our class of Nurturing Fathers which I was having at the addictions center, He
began to open up with the other Fathers, and he was having great input to our group which had seven fathers in it. He absolutely loved the program and about ten weeks into it the social worker did a home visit and was totally shocked by his attitude, he was talking about boundaries and positive self-talk and not arguing around the girls. He had taken responsibility for his girls well-being and was being involved. To take it a step further we were able to get him to go to his basement when he was feeling anger and punch his punching bag before handling the situation. He made tremendous strides and at graduation his daughters all made him several posters congratulated him on his graduation. It really feels good to be a part of a program that makes young lives better and violent free by teaching the parents a better way.
Talk to you later,
NFP AT AIRWAY HEIGHTS CORRECTIONS CENTER
On 7/15/04 we graduated our first group of men from the NFP
at Airway Heights Correctional Center in Airway Heights WA. We started the group with 14 and 13 of them graduated. I was the main facilitator for the group to get them started on the first ever NFP given at this prison. I had three other facilitators that Tim Snell and I had trained about a year ago. My presence was sponsored by a non-profit group called Spiritual Corrections that had heard about our work here at the Work Release and wanted to get the program going at the prison. This was a first for the Washington State Department of Corrections and the response of our class was tremendous. On graduation night we had the full support of the Depart of Corrections and they allowed us to have visitors (friends, family, and spouses of graduating inmates) attend. The event I am happy to say was reported on three localtelevision stations newscasts representing ABC, CBS and Fox Networks.
Although Tim Snell has retired he was invited as a guest speaker at graduation along with myself. The commitment statements to the families made by these inmates were very powerful and I was so proud of my guys and the growth I saw in them in the past 12 weeks. I realize you do not really care much for outcome surveys but I am going to share with you anyway. I give the AAPI-2 pre group and post group. The results of this class overwhelmed me.
As a group they increased in all five constructs 10 to 40 percent. One individual that I had been concerned about had scored a 2 in corporal punishment on the pre-test, this indicated a very pro physical punishment/ abuser. The post test scoring for this individual was a 6, this man had raised his parenting attitudes and behaviors regarding physical punishment a whopping 40 per cent in just twelve weeks. He is now in the average area and is much less likely to use corporal punishment. I always tell new facilitators that they can change the world, it may be on a minute scale that others would never notice but it is change and it is change for the better. I ask them to keep their past evaluations and when they are down and think they aren’t reaching someone in the class to re-read those evaluations because your program does make a difference in the men it serves and the evaluations prove it. One of the inmates at Airway Heights approached me seven different times during the graduation exercises and thanked me, seven times! He was so grateful for this program and what it had done for him, I honestly would not be surprised to see him facilitating this program somewhere in the future. Mark, once again, thank you from the bottom of
Progress with nurturing fathers classesHello Mark,Hope you remember me, Scottie Gilbert, from Hampton, VA. I work for Parents Educating Parents as the Fatherhood Programs Coordinator and I attended your consultant training back in Oct. of last year. I just wanted to give you an up-date. I completed one class back in November and I just started another class on the 14th of January. I should be finishing up my second class in the middle of March. Both classes were conducted at the Virginia Peninsula Regional Jail. We are currently using the journal for ten weeks of class and we also provide the inmates with three Access Visits (on the third Saturday of each month during the ten weeks). This is what makes our program so unique. After completing one third of the program the guys are allowed to have a two hour visit with their children (hands-on interaction) along with the children’s mothers and the idea here is to allow the fathers to apply some of the skills that they’ve learned and discussed in class. After completing two thirds of the program they are allowed another visit and then finally they graduate. The first access visit allows the guys to get re-acquainted and touch their children – most of them have only seen their kids through glass windows in the visiting booths), the second access visit has a birthday theme in which the guys get a chance to celebrate missed/upcoming birthdays with their children. The final access visit is the grand finale’ in which the guys celebrate graduating with families. I thoroughly enjoy putting to use what I learned at the training. If you have any questions regarding the program, don’t hesitate to e-mail me or call.
Wanted to share…Hi Mark,While it’s still fresh in my mind and heart I wanted to share with you the events of my evening. I attended the graduation ceremony of Suma’s Nurturing Father’s Program in Cincinnati. Fourteen African-American men shared their testimonies and read their letters in the presence of their God, wives, children, parents, siblings, and friends. The impact that this program has made on them is life changing. Two had been homeless, many were drug and alcohol abusers, most were absent or neglectful fathers. They have found hope, a way, and light through the efforts of Calvin, his stall, and your program. This isn’t a job, my dear friend, it’s a ministry. I was moved to tears (sobs) and beyond. What a privilege we have been given to intervene in the lives of others. I am truly humbled and I just wanted to share it all with you. I hope this finds you well and going strong.
Just a side note. I sent a follow up AAPI to a former
enrolled father in the group. When I received his information back a few things caught my eye. In the year that it has been since our sessions he has increased his income and completed his high school HSED program. He has full custody of
his two children and has a new job in the career field of his choice that he enjoys a great deal. I am truly glad that I have been able to be part of this tremendous work being done for the fathers today. Not in the past days or future days to come, just to help one dad at a time. It has been a blessing to me in my own growth as a fathers and a man, thank you.
Harold Hampton, Sr.
Oneida Tribe of Indians
Men who have completed the 13-week Nurturing Father’s Program are in a uniquely qualified position to comment on what this experience has meant to them. There are hundreds NFP classes offered around the U.S. The following are comments from ONE such class offered at Orlando Bridge Transition Center (graduation 11/18/09):
“Wow! Awesome experience. The information from this program was life changing.”
Single father of 12 year old.
“It’s something I wish upon every father in the world…”
Single father of 19, 15 year olds.
“I have been involved in a great many programs but none of them touched me the way Nurturing Fathers has. Thank you for this opportunity.”
“I wasn’t sure if I could do this program, but as painful as it was, it made me grow and allow(ed) the 5 year old in me to begin to heal. I really love the program; it made a difference in my life.”
Divorced father of 12, 11, 7 year olds.
“Every father should take this class.”
Single father of 4, 7, 9 year olds.
“I love this program and I feel that, as a father, this program is paramount in terms of learning nurturing skills. Everything about this program was beneficial.”
Married father with 5 year old.
8. Baby, Father, and Grandfather reunite through Nurturing Fathers Program
United Neighbors has been running Nurturing Father’s Groups for four years and just wrapped up our eleventh group. The program is amazing and one of the few things where we see direct outcomes and improvements from such a short amount of time.
Many of the men have stories that are heart wrenching and compelling, joyful and tear provoking but the story that most effected all of us involved in the Nurturing Program is the following.
We had a dad join our group while he and his wife were expecting their first child. He asked to participate because he felt, like many of our participants, that his dad did not do a good job raising him, was an emotionally absent dad and related to him only through discipline and punitive measures. He was astranged from his father and it was weighing heavily on him as the birth of his first child was imminent. After completing the program, he approached his father (whom he had not spoken to in many years) and told him about the Nurturing Fathers group and suggested that his Dad sign up for the group with hope that he would benefit y. He told his dad that ,”he would have to learn to be a better grandfather than he was a Dad if he wanted a relationship with his grandchild.”
The grandfather joined the next Nurturing Group and was an active participant. He then asked to repeat the group because he felt that he had more to learn and discuss. Throughout the second group he spoke about his lack of a relationship with his son and the soon to be born grandchild and gained trememndous support from the group in reaching out to his son, now that he comleted two rounds of Nurturing Fathers.The magic moment came when his son, hs daughter-in-law and his new grandchild came to graduation to support him and to begin to rebuild their relationship. There was not a dry eye in the house!
United Neighbors of Fall River
July 3, 2014
9. Racine Family YMCA
Some NFP Graduates’ Comments 2014
“Without this program, I don’t know where I would be.”
“I am definitely a better father, person, and husband since I got involved in this program.”
“A Nurturing Father will be the best father you’ll ever encounter. I will take from this a learning experience for a lifetime.”
“The program really changed my life.”
“It gave me the tools I need to improve my fathering skills.”
“This program helps save lives.”